All Hallows' Eve

It's that time of year when the leaves have turned, there's a crisp bite in the air and children (and adults) get cracked out on sugar overload.

I love Halloween. Correction. I loved Halloween. I love the Halloween of yesteryear, when there wasn't a care in the world. When kids would trek 5 miles to get to that one house that had the full-sized candy bars. There was no threat of tainted goodies. No worries of sexual offenders handing out treats. No concerns about 11 year olds going house-to-house, unchaperoned, begging complete strangers for candy just by screaming 'Trick or Treat'.

Today's Halloween is full of over-protective, PTA President parents that drive their kids to a mall to get a bag of candy (all while being attached to a kiddie harness). In fact, businesses and communities are holding Halloween events 4 days before the holiday - what is up with that?

That's like celebrating New Year's Eve on Dec. 26. Not cool.

And then you have your two extreme types of trick-or-treaters. The teenagers who throw a little face paint on and call themselves a clown. The lazy kids who throw a cowboy hat on and call themselves a cowboy. Then there are people who honor the Celtic festival of Samhain by developing the most elaborate costume ever (note Lady Gaga's meat dress? NOT creative).

You might be wondering if I pulled the Celtic reference out of my arse...in fact, I did not.

Some folklorists have detected Halloween's origins in the Roman feast of Pomona, the goddess of fruits and seeds, or in the festival of the dead called Parentalia, it is more typically linked to the Celtic festival of Samhain.

The festival of Samhain celebrates the end of the "lighter half" of the year and beginning of the "darker half", and is sometimes regarded as the "Celtic New Year".

The ancient Celts believed that the border between this world and the Otherworld became thin on Samhain, allowing spirits (both harmless and harmful) to pass through. The family's ancestors were honoured and invited home while harmful spirits were warded off. It is believed that the need to ward off harmful spirits led to the wearing of costumes and masks. Their purpose was to disguise oneself as a harmful spirit and thus avoid harm.

Any holiday that has an Irish history is pretty cool in my book. Ones that allow us to dress up like idiots and overindulge in treats are even better. St. Patrick's Day? Dress up like a leprechaun and drink lots of beer. Halloween? Dress up like a leprechaun and eat lots of candy.

Eating lots of candy I will do this year. I will go to the store and buy in bulk - justifying that it's for the kids. Knowing damn good and well they're all at the Safety Committe's Halloween Extravaganza at the mall. Then, not wanting the candy to go to waste, I will dig into the bowl and pick out my treats...until one by one they disappear into the crevices of my teeth.

Then next year? I won't have to dress up. I will go as a toothless bum.