Gone But Not Forgotten

Everyone - no matter their age, gender, sexuality, status, color - has met someone who has had a major impact on their life.  Sometimes, that impact can be a negative one.  Sometimes, many times, that impact is a positive one.  I have had both in my life.  I have had the unfortunate experience of meeting - and dating - someone who single-handedly changed the direction of my life.  His character, his words, his actions led me to believe I was a nobody, I wasn't deserving of happiness, I would never amount to anything.

And yet.

I then had the fortunate experience of meeting and befriending someone who single-handedly changed the direction in which my life was going.  His character, his words, his actions led me to believe I was a somebody, I deserved happiness, and that I held the world in the palm of my hand.  If not for this wonderful man, I would not be here today.

I met this person when I was at my lowest.  He saw something in me that I didn't see in myself.  His friendship brought me not only happiness, but a sense of worth.  He was my shoulder to lean on, my sounding board, my competitor when it came to sarcastic quips.  But, the most important gift my friend gave me was the ability to find love, happy love, true love.

He enabled me to take off my insecure blinders and trust people.  He paved the way for me to find my husband.  For that I will forever be grateful.

Sadly, I lost contact with my friend.  Even in the age of Facebook and other social media avenues, I hadn't spoken to him in more than five years.  But, as it is with true friends, I knew that if we did connect, we'd be able to pick up right where we left off.  Unfortunately, we will never be able to pick up where we left off.

My wonderful friend - a son, uncle, husband, dad and friend - passed away last month.  I found out a month after the fact and for this I am sad.  The world has lost a beautiful human being.  A person who truly inspired me and many others to be true to ourselves, to treat others with respect.

I am sad that he is gone, but I am thankful for having met him.  I am thankful for his friendship.  I am thankful for the ongoing gift of life he gave me.  I truly believe I will see him again, that I can show him how I turned out because of him.

RIP my dear friend. Your dad, uncle and PaPa welcome you home.